The Stance on Pants

Common social media posts regarding lack of clothing draw inappropriate attention

Maddie Jewett and Alex Kontopanos

It’s happened to all of us.

We’re bored, so we open up Twitter.

We casually scroll through and stop to read only the tweets that happen to catch our eyes.

Quotes. A subtweet. Complaining. Song lyrics. A duck-face selfie. More complaining. Another selfie.

Then we read one that draws our attention even more than the extremely intriguing examples just listed:

“Ugh. Such a rough day. Just got home from school, time to take my pants off.”

Alright, now before we get too far into this, let us tell you.

We love repping the over-sized sweatshirt, no pants outfit just as much as the next teenage girl.

But let’s just say we would never tweet about it, letting everyone know we were not wearing pants at the exact moment in which we weren’t wearing them.

We’ve noticed a recent change in the attitude toward pants. For some reason, all teenage girls have developed a distaste for them. What is the scientific reasoning behind this? Did every girl in the nation suddenly despise the feeling of having clothing on her legs? Has the entire new generation of girls forgotten the struggle for women to wear anything other than a dress and an apron?

Let’s take a minute to recap the history of pants for women.

As surprising as this may seem, women have only been wearing pants officially for less than 50 years.

Instead, they wore dresses that cover about 90 percent more leg than the shorts girls wear now do.

The concept of women wearing pants was introduced circa 1940, mostly through movies and times of war. Fashion idols and characters such as “Rosie the Riveter” revolutionized the era of dress code for women. Denim for females became popular as the ‘60s approached, and in the early 1970s, “Vogue” featured blue jeans on their cover.

Yet, despite all the effort it took for women to finally be able to wear pants, girls still complain about them.

Honestly, sometimes it feels like girls just post about not wearing pants for the sole purpose of attracting attention — and not the good kind. We assume most people like to come home and get into a large T-shirt and sweatpants — or maybe no sweatpants at all — but that still doesn’t mean you should post about it.

We get it — you don’t like pants.

Your mother must be so proud.

Ironically, your grandmother probably loves them considering she was prohibited from wearing them when she was our age.

You know, the whole, ‘We walked to school in the snow uphill both ways,’ sort of thing.

We’re not trying to go on a feminist rant about how we should only wear pants to prove how liberated we are or that we hate people who hate pants — because we don’t.

But stop saying you don’t like pants because we know you’re going to wear them once winter rolls around. Be grateful we have the ability to wear something that is so crucial to maintaining our body temperatures.

Homeostasis and whatnot.

And let’s be real — no one wants to read about your hatred for a simple article of clothing on any social media site.

Not even Facebook.

So the next time you decide to tell Twitter ‘what’s on your mind,’ please, for the sake of all your followers, don’t mention the amount of clothing you happen to be wearing (or not wearing).